No Good Deed

So on Friday I took a huge box of clothes to Goodwill. A few weeks prior I had cleaned out my closet of every piece of clothing I haven’t worn since I moved into my condo two years ago. There was quite a lot. Some of the stuff I’d never worn, ‘cause regardless of how daring I am in the dressing room, some outfits just wouldn’t work on the mean streets of Long Beach. Also some stuff I just can’t fit my fat ass into anymore. There, the truth. Suck on it!

I brought the box around to the back of the Goodwill on Willow and Atlantic, as instructed by the hastily-written piece of paper on the front door. Inside the collection area were two sassy women (I could just tell they were sassy, ok) chatting while hanging up clothes. I put my box down and just stood there. Neither of them stopped what they were doing or even acknowledged me or the box.

You know me; I waited about a minute before I said anything. One of the sassy ladies said “you wanna receipt?” I said, “Yes, please” in my most un-Leanalike tone. She gave me this indignant look and proceeded to take the longest time humanly possible to write out a freakin’ receipt.

Now I understand that charity should be an unselfish thing that people do. People should just do it out of the goodness of their hearts and all that. But if charity can give me a warm feeling in my soul AND a tax break in April does it really hurt anybody? I used to donate clothes all the time before I had a condo and had the option of writing it off. And it’s not like the deduction is going to help me that much anyway. The government will find some way to stick it to me this year so that come April I’ll be sitting in my tax advisor’s office begging her to find a way that I can avoid paying taxes again.

Who said owning property was a great thing? I would like to kick that person in the ass. Right after I find those sassy women again. I forgot to tell them something about charity.