Silence of the Neighbor

Creepy Next Door Neighbor has a woman in his place tonight. I saw her through the kitchen window as I walked by. Which wasn’t easy, I might add, as the blinds were nearly closed. How rude of people not to leave their blinds open for the neighbors’ viewing pleasure.

Part of me wanted to quickly run to his front door, pound on the wood and scream “get out of there lady, that dude is a serious freakshow.“ The other part of me wanted to run straight to my place so I could pick out an outfit to wear when the t.v. camera crews showed up to interview me about the guy next door whom they discovered enjoyed chopping up women and stuffing them in his deep freeze.

I’m already practicing my close up in the mirror and the new twist I’ll put on the usual, neighbor interview. “I always thought he was a little off. He was so quiet. Never talked to a soul. I guess the smell should have been some sort of hint…”