The IKEA Witch Project

I got lost in IKEA today. I was out of my element. I usually go to the one in Carson, but today I went to the one in Burbank. I haven’t been there in about five years, and boy has it changed.

The layout was completely different than the Carson IKEA. For one, the Carson IKEA is three floors. For two, the Burbank IKEA is completely ass-backwards and ridiculous.

I ended up being the asshole walking the IKEA path against traffic. Much like going down the up escalator, I was given odd looks and spent most of my time dodging people.

The fourth time I came upon the same display of Markör bookcases and Bestǻ shelves I knew I was in trouble.

I finally teamed up with a couple wearing matching backpacks and knee highs and wandered with them to the exit.

And I didn’t buy one damned thing.