It's 3 a.m. Do You Know Where Your Leana Is?
I just got home from the Commerce Casino, where I had my most exciting evening of poker yet. Let’s just forget the fact that I’ve only played in a non-tournament game twice since I started my obsession with Texas Hold-em. Let’s just concentrate on the excitement that was tonight.
I decided to celebrate the forthcoming Christmas holiday, and subsequent four days away from the office, by going to the casino. My dad was nice enough to send me cash for Christmas (how did he know that’s what I really, really wanted?) and told me to do whatever I wanted with it. I’m sure he might have meant pay a bill or buy a sweater, but I took it to mean, “Feed your poker addition.”
Had I believed in bad luck I would have turned around before I even got to the casino. I took the wrong exit off the 710 freeway, got lost and had to park a million miles away. I get inside and signed up for a 2/4 table with 20 people in front of me, and 45 minutes later I realized I had signed up for Stud, not Hold’em.
I’m glad I realized it before I sat down at the table. How embarrassing! I almost bolted. It was almost 10 p.m. and I was getting cranky. I asked one of the pit bosses where the Hold’em section was and he directed me to the 300 tables right next to the door I passed through to enter the casino. What a dumb ass am I? Please don’t feel the need to answer that in the comments section.
After waiting another 20 minutes, I got seated at a 1/2 table. I didn’t want to get involved with the 1/2 tables ‘cause your rate of return is crap. You could sit at a table for 3 hours, be doing fairly well and still only walk away with $30 extra dollars. No thank you! But it was the first free table and I was so itching to play that I took the seat.
I ended up setting between this huge Mexican man covered in tattoos and a creepy old guy wearing a member’s only jacket. I could tell it was going to be a fun table ‘cause everyone was chatty. Apparently the Mexican guy would raise every time around making the pots pretty big, so it was really more of a 4/8 table than a 1/2 . I almost walked then, not wanting to get forced to spend $4 every hand to see a flop, but again I stayed.
Which was a good thing. Everyone was comfortable with calling this guy’s reraises, and since the blinds were only 50 cents and a buck, I would only have to go in when I thought could play something. And I wasn’t bullied by the Mexican guy ‘cause I knew he’d call with crap anyway.
I got my all-time greatest hand tonight. I was in the big blind and was dealt two Kings. This in itself is an awesome starting hand. The Mexican caps us out at $4 and we saw the flop, K, 4, K. Holy shit! I made a four of a kind on the flop. Inside I took a double take and I think I peed myself a little. A freakin’ four of a kind. The Mexican raised and I just called. It’s called slow playing and my boyfriend Phil Gordon does it all the time and he’s so cute about it. The rest of the table called as well.
The turn was a J and I re raised. The River was a ten, but it didn’t matter. The only hands that can beat a four of a kind are the straight flush and the royal flush and there wasn’t three of the same suit on the board, so it wasn’t even possible. I reraised. There’s no limit after the river so you can reraise, until someone calls you or folds. The Mexican’s hoochie mamma, seated to his right, a big old white woman kept reraising me. I almost felt sorry for her, so I only reraised three times- finally I called. She turned over two Jacks declaring triumphantly, “full house.” I paused and looked at her smiling, wrinkly face. “Four Kings,” I replied. The entire table gasped and then cheered. It was quite a made-for-TV moment. It was so awesome. I ended up taking more than $100 for that hand and nearly wiped out the Mexican’s girlfriend.
The table talked about my hand for at least another half hour. It was good to know I would be remembered. I’m sure one of them is composing a song about my four kings right now.
The rest of the evening was fairly uneventful. The member’s only jacket crapped out long before and the Mexican and his hoochie got bored and left. A bunch of young white boys started filling in the empty spots. They all apparently knew each other and were being rowdy and I wasn’t in the mood for it. Plus the new dealer was giving me shit for hands and I didn’t want to lose any more of my mountains of chips.
I ended up cashing out $150 up (not including the initial investment from dear ol’ dad) That extra money will help a lot, if I can keep myself away from the casino the rest of the weekend. I’m going to try to get my aunt and cousins to play tomorrow night, wait I mean tonight, damn, it’s late. The stakes won’t be quite as high but it will be fun none the less.
I decided to celebrate the forthcoming Christmas holiday, and subsequent four days away from the office, by going to the casino. My dad was nice enough to send me cash for Christmas (how did he know that’s what I really, really wanted?) and told me to do whatever I wanted with it. I’m sure he might have meant pay a bill or buy a sweater, but I took it to mean, “Feed your poker addition.”
Had I believed in bad luck I would have turned around before I even got to the casino. I took the wrong exit off the 710 freeway, got lost and had to park a million miles away. I get inside and signed up for a 2/4 table with 20 people in front of me, and 45 minutes later I realized I had signed up for Stud, not Hold’em.
I’m glad I realized it before I sat down at the table. How embarrassing! I almost bolted. It was almost 10 p.m. and I was getting cranky. I asked one of the pit bosses where the Hold’em section was and he directed me to the 300 tables right next to the door I passed through to enter the casino. What a dumb ass am I? Please don’t feel the need to answer that in the comments section.
After waiting another 20 minutes, I got seated at a 1/2 table. I didn’t want to get involved with the 1/2 tables ‘cause your rate of return is crap. You could sit at a table for 3 hours, be doing fairly well and still only walk away with $30 extra dollars. No thank you! But it was the first free table and I was so itching to play that I took the seat.
I ended up setting between this huge Mexican man covered in tattoos and a creepy old guy wearing a member’s only jacket. I could tell it was going to be a fun table ‘cause everyone was chatty. Apparently the Mexican guy would raise every time around making the pots pretty big, so it was really more of a 4/8 table than a 1/2 . I almost walked then, not wanting to get forced to spend $4 every hand to see a flop, but again I stayed.
Which was a good thing. Everyone was comfortable with calling this guy’s reraises, and since the blinds were only 50 cents and a buck, I would only have to go in when I thought could play something. And I wasn’t bullied by the Mexican guy ‘cause I knew he’d call with crap anyway.
I got my all-time greatest hand tonight. I was in the big blind and was dealt two Kings. This in itself is an awesome starting hand. The Mexican caps us out at $4 and we saw the flop, K, 4, K. Holy shit! I made a four of a kind on the flop. Inside I took a double take and I think I peed myself a little. A freakin’ four of a kind. The Mexican raised and I just called. It’s called slow playing and my boyfriend Phil Gordon does it all the time and he’s so cute about it. The rest of the table called as well.
The turn was a J and I re raised. The River was a ten, but it didn’t matter. The only hands that can beat a four of a kind are the straight flush and the royal flush and there wasn’t three of the same suit on the board, so it wasn’t even possible. I reraised. There’s no limit after the river so you can reraise, until someone calls you or folds. The Mexican’s hoochie mamma, seated to his right, a big old white woman kept reraising me. I almost felt sorry for her, so I only reraised three times- finally I called. She turned over two Jacks declaring triumphantly, “full house.” I paused and looked at her smiling, wrinkly face. “Four Kings,” I replied. The entire table gasped and then cheered. It was quite a made-for-TV moment. It was so awesome. I ended up taking more than $100 for that hand and nearly wiped out the Mexican’s girlfriend.
The table talked about my hand for at least another half hour. It was good to know I would be remembered. I’m sure one of them is composing a song about my four kings right now.
The rest of the evening was fairly uneventful. The member’s only jacket crapped out long before and the Mexican and his hoochie got bored and left. A bunch of young white boys started filling in the empty spots. They all apparently knew each other and were being rowdy and I wasn’t in the mood for it. Plus the new dealer was giving me shit for hands and I didn’t want to lose any more of my mountains of chips.
I ended up cashing out $150 up (not including the initial investment from dear ol’ dad) That extra money will help a lot, if I can keep myself away from the casino the rest of the weekend. I’m going to try to get my aunt and cousins to play tomorrow night, wait I mean tonight, damn, it’s late. The stakes won’t be quite as high but it will be fun none the less.
1 Comments:
At 7:34 AM,
SeriouslyNoWay said…
Gosh, it's really hard to get Cousin Julie to gamble. Tee hee! Anyone remember the $98.00 she won at the teaching table in Vegas. And, were playing bingo for prizes too. Yay! Leana's family starts down the road to addiction.
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